How to wear white socks: the handbook
There's a question that harasses men of all ages. It has nothing to do with “who's gonna win the next match”. It's an earsplitting dilemma that sounds like “Can I wear white socks?”. And, if the answer is yes, when can I wear them? When, on the other side, is it better to leave them resting in the drawer? Find it out on where is my UNDERWEAR?".
Don’t put your trust into anyone threatening a locusts invasion after you put on a white sock. You can wear them. You simply need to know how. If you have never wondered how to wear your white socks, you either have an innate sense of style or you are doing it wrong and you have never noticed the horrified looks of the people passing-by. Knowing how to wear white socks and not making mistake is crucial not to be ridiculous, inappropriate or even trigger overreactions, like the above mentioned locusts.
How to wear white socks: 4 simple rules
Until a few years ago, it was gone: swallowed by the last centrifuge or fled away with its partner, it had capitulated to darker colours. Almost nobody used it, except the Blameless Sandal-and-Sock Heralds. But, let's face it: their opinion really doesn't matter.
Recently, white socks have left their shyness aside to pop out once again: finally freed by the preconception "white is bad", it is now wore and shown, by both well-known TV stars as David Letterman, and neighbors.
But, what's the right way to wear white socks?
- Rule # 1. Sock (white or black that is) can only be wore with shoes
It seems obvious: first socks, then shoes. Right?
However, it's not as simple as it seems. We'll never get tired of saying it: socks only get along with shoes.
Not with sandals.
It would not be acceptable even if the most iconic worldwide stylist decided to wear them.
It's the most unforgivable mistake that you can commit, the one that would trigger the locusts arrival, the Angels of the Apocalypse riding, the Mayan prophecy fulfilment.
So, yes to white socks with shoes.
But what shoes?
- Rule # 2. David Letterman docet
The fact that you can doesn't mean you have to.
You can wear white socks, you don't have to wear them with anything that pops into your mind.
If you have an impeccable style like David Letterman, then you can afford to wear white socks with your best or worst pants. If, instead, you are part of the mortals ranks, it is best to wear white socks only with sneakers.
Choose your best sneakers and match them with white socks: no one will judge you.
- Rule # 3. Pay attention to terry and to criticism
This is simple: yes to white sock, but they must be made of cotton.
If you have decided to dare and to wear white cotton socks with a pair of jeans, well, we can only congratulate you for your audacity.
If you have opted for terry socks, well, we can only ask you to go home, change and do penance. Terry socks are to be used exclusively with sneakers.
- Rule # 4. White socks must be clean. Really.
Now that they are back in vogue, they must be treated kindly.
Or, at the very least, they must be really white.
Make sure you clean them by following this grandma piece of advice : boil some water with lemon and plunge your socks in it. They'll be brand-new white in no time at all. At least, if they are not too old. In that case, the solution is simple: contact "W.I.M.U - where is my UNDERWEAR"!